F*** You, Falcons

I have a long post on the Tampa game yesterday that I will put up later. For now, I want to discuss the franchise in general.

I just read an interview with Rich McKay where he pretty much blamed Mike Vick for all things wrong with the Falcons. Of course, after bitching about it for three paragraphs, he then added on the “That’s not an excuse” caveat. This is an absolutely ludicrous sentiment. We had Mike Vick on this team the last two seasons, and he didn’t make much of a difference. What’s made the difference is boneheaded draft picks, trades, and free-agent signings. I’ve mentioned before in this space some of the oversized contracts (Brooking, Kerney, Peerless Price, Vick, etc.) and am now proud to add to that list the Mughelli contract (6 years, $18 million + $5 million signing bonus). Mughelli is the highest paid fullback in league history. This is a man who has 16 career carries in 5 NFL seasons. Rich McKay would be quick to tell you that Mughelli’s strength is not rushing. Fair enough. Is it his 27 career receptions? Is it his blocking (blocking for a sub-par rushing attack and allowing more sacks than a gay porn, mind you)?

Let’s not forget our recent drafts:

DeAngelo Hall (basket case…talented, but fucking crazy)
Michael Jenkins (sucks at catching footballs and avoiding tacklers)
Matt Schaub (doing a pretty good job–for Houston)

Roddy White (see “Jenkins, Michael)
Jonathan Babineaux (“Vick Jr.” for his propensity to kill dogs)
Jordan Beck (sucks at football in general, albeit for another team now–so that’s kind of a positive for us)

John Abraham (I’m really helping the Falcons out here on a technicality, since they gave up their No. 1 to get Abraham. That’s overly fair to them)
Jimmy Williams (Very talented corner back with severe attitude problems from Virginia Tech. Yes, that does sound quite familiar)
Jerious Norwood (Nut, meet Blind Squirrel. So glad you found each other)

So there you have it. The real reasons why the Falcons suck, and not one of them has to do with Mike Vick beating/killing dogs (except the Babineaux thing, kinda indirectly–but whatever).

So Rich McKay/Arthur Blank, when you lay your bald head/creepy-mustachioed face on your greenback-stuffed pillows at night, I hope your conscience keeps you from sleeping. Maybe that can begin to serve as some sort of punishment for what you’ve done to this franchise.

Fuck you.


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